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A photo can say a thousand things
But it can't say the million things I wanna say
A photo can capture the way we were
But it can't capture the way we are
'Cause you're far away
What it's like to know you
What it's like to touch you

You were my life
you were my faith
You gave me hope every day

When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me you don't need me
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot


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For friends that stand by my side,
For friends that never see me right,

I'm a crusader without an armor

It's funny how people can point out zillions of your mistakes in just a simple conversation. I felt that I'd been crucified by the conversation that eventually led me to nowhere. (Kudos to Houkiboshi)

Yes, I must admit, you’re hurting me,
In a way I can’t quite comprehend.
You can say all these words and phrases,
But I’m not even sure if our friendship will mend.

Stop trying to hide things from me,
I know you probably want it more than I do.
But if you really want me to say something to you,
Try acting more like a friend with honesty,
Than a secret enemy filled with lies and stories.

The fiercest battle has just begun

I'd lost in a battle. I endure the battle without fight because I can't utter the words that was lingering on my mind. I was blindfolded by our memories. The good old days that we always proud of. The memories that we used to think that we might tell our daughters, sons and grandchildren. The memories that embedded in our head. But you've tainted it with hypocrisy and animosity. Yes, you did.

I don't have to justify myself to anyone

I need no one to tell me about my deeds and sins. In the end, leaves will fall and the truth will be known. So, enough with the web of lies. I want to hear no more. I want to hear no more. All the things you left behind,

I don't care.


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listening|Waiting for the World to Change by John Mayer]

I haven't post anything for a quite sometimes till I read Liyana's post in her il Bel Far Niente, it feels like a call to blog about this. Maybe something regarding to this.

I am a Muslim. Living in a Muslim country, Malaysia. Multicultural, multilingual, multiracial Malaysia. Of late, I try hard to comprehend what really happening to the society. The diversity seems to be our paramount weakness and reason to hate each other.

I do believe every religion; Islam, Christian, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Kabbalah, Sikhism, Scientology, Shinto, Jainism and others- do promote peace among religions and its respective devotees. No matter what religion whomsoever devotes to, absolutely no one should justify and critics others’ beliefs because it is absolutely his/her prerogative.

It’s indeed a real shame that people see only the differences that separate them. If we look closely what we have in common, then half of the world’s problem would be solved without any bullets and bloodshed. None of the Holy Books; the Quran, the Bible, Mahabharata or Upanishads promotes their followers to shed blood and tear the world apart. None.

As I was walking down the street or meeting up with other people, I can’t help myself from thinking about contradiction that makes us difference. I am indeed think that our contradictoriness is something beautiful and interesting to learn.

Everyday, all of us meet up with thousands or at least tens of people that came from all walks of life. Imagine if everyone was wearing the same shirt color, had the same haircut, speak the same language and read the same books, life will be much, much murky and monotonous. God created us with many differences not to be torn apart, but to learn and find about others. Therefore, above all, we must be optimist about our differences and do not make it as a reason to hate. There is no reasons to hate.


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The distance hurts so much. I wish the minutes and hours will erase the memories of ours. The moments that we enjoyed, the places that we've visited, the songs we sang, the dreams that we shared. How I wish the dividing glass wall will just crumble down to earth. 

But it won't.


I spend hours watching your every graceful move. I never move. It feels so close, yet so far. Too far for my bare hands to reach. I knew it's my mistakes that drift you away. Why do I always hurt the ones that I love? Why do you always go away? Please, stay.


My spirit is dying since you've been away. Will you come and nurture it the way you used to again? It may sound ridiculous, but it's true. I swear this is true.


I think I'm in love with you, after all.


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I feel like a child tonight.

I feel that I want to burst into tears, but I won't. It's funny how time fooled us into. We thought everything are ours. The ambition, the laughters, the joy, the friendship. But things slipped through our fingers. I tried my best to let go of you, I started laughing to something new, I meet new people I've never met, I do things that I used hope to do with you. But my mind still thinking of you. 

My mind filled with emptiness. 

It's funny how we are running and hiding from each other. Try to hide the feelings inside and pretend we will survive. I am happy with myself now and I believe so do you. Our dreams have faded by time. I tried my best to get over you, stand taller than you, speak louder than you, but my heart bleeds, my voice croaked, my knees are weak whenever I think of you. It hurts to see you not seeing me the way you used to anymore.

I can tickle and make you laugh no more ; yes, we used to laugh our hearts out remember? You know me and I know you. But there's always something that both of us will never knew. I don't know what I did is an act of bravery or stupidity. A man's got to do what a man's got to do, remember? But you never understand that. It's empty without you by my side, and I miss you.

I miss you so, so much.



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This semester is about to come to an end, and my brain has been working on what I want to be and do next semester. I hope it will be much, much better and ermm...meaningful! Yep...Perhaps!

Here, my MAYBEs-list (oh, I should really stop hallucinating!)

  • Maybe No1: New CameraPhone

    • I've been my archaic-looking-black-Samsung throughout this semester. I hope to get a good phone with higher megapixels to snap, snap, and snaps more picture and stuff it into my blog!

  • Maybe No2: Clubber (?)

    • It's not like what you think! Hahaha! It's not I'm about to be a staunch visitor of Zouk, or whatsoever, I want to join more academic clubs here, in UiTM. I've joined ETHOS just recently, and been planning to join Kelab Pemikiran Mahathir (If I'm not mistaken) and maybe, photography club, even though I know no basics at all! But, I think it worth a try...

  • Maybe No3: Flogger

    • Flogger? Yup, but just be a part-time flogger laa because I just realized that I LOVE foods! That's why I've been thinking to get a phone with camera. So the scrumptious meals won't be deep-sixed. :) another concrete reason to add some kilos!

  • Maybe No4: Book, book, booooooks

    • Ok. More books.

  • Maybe No5: Coming soon!!

    • Daydreaming is no folly, ok! I need TIME to wisely think (or dream 'bout them)

You've read No5. I have to get more inspiration now to continue blogging.

A really, really short nap will do.

Song: Way Back Into Love by Hugh Grant & Drew Barrymore


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Yes! Our very first potluck in this spanking new condominium (erk...apartment)..  But..Since this is our FIRST potluck, only 30 charming (it doesn't men you ain't charming), lucky people were invited tomorrow..

      Don't worry, we going to held the same party in the near future! Hahaha.. :P Very soon, very, very soon! 

TheFlyer! I designed it!

The fllyer was designed by ME!



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I shouldn't be blogging this right now. I have test tomorrow. But I really think I have to blog about this..

I still vividly remember her cheerful face. A face that makes Malaysia proud few years ago. My mom even cut her article out of local newspaper and put on my desk. Sufiah Farooq, 23, entered Oxford University at the age of 13! But now a used-to-be Maths genius is reportedly 'selling' her body after ran away from her parents house at the age of 15 and describe that she had enough of physical and mental abuse that his father drag her into.

Her dad was found guilty for sexual harassment against two of his tuition students and jailed for years. The Malaysian gifted-girl should be smiling with the world under her feet by now, but instead of being it, she now selling her body over the internet by the name of Shilpa Lee. What a tragic ending for a bright girl like her. The only thing that Malaysians can do now is pray for her sanity and hope her will be back on track soon.

Obviously, a gift can always turn into a curse.

Current Mood: Hectic
Song of the Day: Closer by Travis


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She's back. Who on earth is sexier, edgier, talented more than this fella? Love it or Hate it, no one... This is completely gibberish post. Gosh. :P





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I've just visited Saru's Understanding Color just now and baam! It's like a call for the curly like me to jot something on my ultimate pristine weapon here, my blog. Not only the punks, emos or etc, etc got their own blues about their hair, we do too!

Here are some not-so-positive responds from friends of mine:

  • Rambut ko bukan wavy, it's curly!
  • Curly-haired people are like niggas! ( Dang! It's really pissed me off! )
  • Xpayah laa sikat rambut..It's just look damn same...
Having this curly-wurly hair is totally a bless from God! At least, I have hair, not to show off what I possess, but to know that God created people in many kind and forms. Some people keep on be like a perching parrot; I x support racism laa, this laa, that laa... but comparing people to Niggas is really a crime, just like those Apartheid days. At least, I don't try to change what God has given to me and have no regrets over it. Imagine if all of us got ruler-straight hair... Borink!
Therefore, stop comparing because we have our own specialties as well as weaknesses. There's no point of having straight hair, If you have curly-wurly mind about others! Right?! Straight, Curly, Bald, Botak tengah ke....rambut jarang ke... are cool! As long as you have straight mind (& sexual orientation too!!!) :P
Current Mood: Straight, unlike my hair.
Song of the Day: Congratulation I Heart You by Alesana


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